Back, way back, in my TWA flight attendant training, we were taught how to successfully evacuate 410 passengers out of a 747 by means of eight emergency exits, at approximately "one butt per second on those eight slides". Granted, some of those butts would land on the tarmac below in a crumpled and injured, perhaps very injured heap. But, they would be out of that plane. One physical aid we were taught in order to encourage any balking passenger onto the evacuation slide was to grab them by the back of the neck, and tuck one's knee right under their hiney. BOOM! They'd be on the slide and halfway down before they could scream, "Jiminy Pete!".
I think today was one of those days. Someone should have grabbed me by the scruff of my neck and tucked their proverbial knee under my mental well-being and WHACK!! Someone should have told me to straighten up and fly right. Maybe someone should have just...
Oh. Never mind. Someone did a kinder and gentler motion to get me back here to writing fine tripe and utter nonsense. Thank you, Louise. I am back on track.
More to come.